Undercurrents

I put my toe in
To test the water
And my foot, my body following
Was snatched away and
Borne through the years swallowing
Rushes until now - washed-up
On some shore like jetsam my
Footprints litter the sand -
I wonder where
I have landed where
I go from here where 
I am
So soaked and bleary-eyed from
Seeing through water.
I have lost the calm habits
Of wind and sky, the ability to lie
Under sun quietly.  I am
Waterlogged with whitewater
Memories: rills of green 
and gentle tides; terrible 
Undertows sluicing - that powered
Push and suck of water heavy with
Writhing - nothing can dismay such
Fluidity (least of all me) yet I cannot
Stay within the silence here, the
Light breeze, the swaying trees, 
Breathe beneath such 
Glancing light - this place 
Stabs my eyes and hurts
My lungs -
I long for depths of waternight, to
Dive back in, plunge again to
A blue absorption, live within 
The rocking soul of its absolving
River that washes the heart
Free - timeless swelling sea
Alive and moving endlessly
In glassy days - and see
Upon which shore they throw me 
Next time.  Perhaps then
I can bear the light, the air, the trees
And - breathing -
Stay.

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