The Trial

I have juggled you
and words and days,
hopes and fears,
thoughts and lists,
half-crazed.

I have organised important sessions, 
tried perfection, seen frustration, 
endured the present for the future 
felt bruised and dazed.

Now I need some understanding, 
touch and warmth, 
a recompense for lack of care - no
thoughtless handling -
when I need you to be there

you stride about
mind in a haze
shout and storm and grasp - you
push me back
plough-up my mind
throw love straight
in my face.

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